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Stupidity...My Love for You, Chapter Seven

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Sent to the Roswell Slash Archive June 14, 2002


        Zan....

        He was kissing me so hard that it was causing me to become dizzy with giddiness. Before I even had a chance to retaliate he had me pinned below him as he continued to plunder my more then eager mouth. I loved the way that he felt laying full body atop me...loved the way that with each wave of his tongue against my own he would cause my blood pressure to skyrocket until I was seeing stars before my closed eyes. I could feel his hand as it snaked down my stomach...moving past the waistband of my jeans and as much as I longed to feel him hold my precious jewels...that was not the way that I wanted our second bout of love making to transpire. "Dimples...please" I groaned as I grabbed his hand and brought it up to my chest where I laid it gently over my furiously beating heart. " Not this way...I want to do this right"

        "It is right" was his reply as he once again ran his hand down the length of my body as he attempted to undo the buttons of my constricted jeans. "I want you to stay with me tonight"

        "As wonderful as that offer sounds...and trust me it is killing me to do this...but I can't...I have to leave"

        "WHAT" he blurted out...a look of complete shock upon his handsome face.

        "I want to do this proper. You mean more to me then just a quick @#%$ whenever I can get it" I spoke truthfully as I ran my hand tenderly over his pouting lips. "I want to take you out to dinner...want to get to know you...want you to get to know me. I want to try and make this work and I know..."

        "What exactly do you think is going to happen between us" I heard him question...irritation clearly readable in his booming voice. "I am not looking for a relationship with you Zan. All I want from you is as you so eloquently put it...is a quick @#%$ from you whenever I can get it" I felt the rush of cool air quickly surround me as he jerked the warmth of his body off of mine and began pacing hurriedly before the couch I was still laying on. It was my turn to get irritated as I jumped off the couch as I grabbed him by his forearms and forced him to face me.

        "Look Kyle...I know that my dupe hurt you deeply. I may not know what he did to you per say...but I know you were hurt none the least. I just want you to know that I am not Max Evans...that I am the complete opposite in that I know what a wonderful man you are...and no matter what you say or do...nothing will ever make me change my opinion of you. Please Dimples...just give me a chance to love you and hopefully in the not to distant future you will learn to love me"

        "Stop @#%$ calling me that" I heard him holler as he pulled quickly from the grip that I held on him as if my touch had scalded him. "How can you say that you love me when you don't even @#%$ know me"

        "I know you...I know enough about you to know that I want to be with you...but I want to do it the right way. Please Kyle...just give me a chance to show how much I can love you. Let me take you out tomorrow night" I knew that I sounded like a wimp...sounded like a @#%$ crybaby...but I didn't care for I was more worried about losing him then I was about worrying how unmanly I sounded.

        "No...get the @#%$ out of my apartment...out of my life"

        Anger flooded me quickly...as I once again grabbed him by the arms and forced him to stand before me for it seemed that I was going to have to do what needed to be done the hard way. "This is how it is going to happen tomorrow night...and you have no say in the matter" he attempted to object...but I quickly covered his mouth with my own and swallowed his negative words. Breaking our kiss...I looked him square in the eyes as I continued my words before I left him speechless as I quickly exited his apartment. "You will go out with me tomorrow night. I will pick you up at seven o clock and you will dress semi casual...and if you stand me up...well we don't want to go into what will happen if you stand me up Dimples" and with another quick kiss...I was gone.

        I was ecstatic the next night when I showed up at his door...bouquet of flowers in hand at promptly seven o clock to find that I did not have to force him to go out with me after all. I was expecting this huge fight where I was going to have to use my alien powers of persuasion before I dragged him out of his apartment kicking and screaming. When he opened the door I was awe struck at just how handsome this man really was and I had to fight every unmanly urge not to take his gorgeous ass right then and there on his doorstep. I did however fight my urges as I presented him with the flowers and a lingering kiss upon the softness of his lips. I watched as he took the flowers that I held out before him and causally tossed them on the table behind us. I have to admit that this careless gesture stung just a bit...but I wasn't going to let that little act of indifference ruin the perfect evening that I had planned. I quickly learned that Kyle had other ideas as to how that night was going to play out...and that I was the one that was in fact along for the ride.

        "Your chariot awaits" I chuckled as in a grand like gesture I escorted him to my waiting car that was parked in front of his building. I tried to open the door for him in a gentlemanly fashion...but was rebuffed as he pushed past me and yanked open the door himself as he climbed in and slammed the door roughly behind him. "Just @#%$ great" I cursed to myself as I ran to the other side of the car and let myself in. He didn't say one word as I drove in the direction of the restaurant. I tried to start a conversation several times and each time my only response was silence. I was determined not to let him ruin this evening...damned determined and that was all there was to it. Once we reached the restaurant he jumped out of the car before I even had a chance to hand my keys to the valet and headed inside with me quietly seething in tow.

        "Welcome to Jonathans..." the waiter spoke as he stood before our table where he attempted to take our drink order. "Can I interest you in something to drink before I ..."

        "Save it" I heard him cut the waiter off rudely in mid spiel...speaking quite loudly. "Just bring me a beer...a very large beer and keep them coming until I get so @#%$ faced that you have to carry me out of this joint"

        "Kyle..." I spoke through gritted teeth...purely embarrassed at his childish behavior.

        "I said bring me a @#%$ beer" he screamed at the waiter even louder...ignoring my pleas for him to calm down.

        "I am so sorry" I apologized to the stunned waiter as I looked around at the glaring couples around us. "Please...just give us a minute" The waiter excused himself and I tried desperately to remain calm for I was well on my way to blowing my stack. "What the hell is your problem" I whispered angrily as I stared into his blue depths as I awaited his response.

        "All I want is a beer...is that so much to ask for" he spoke snidely as he thwarted my attempts to hold his hand.

        I knew what it was that he was doing. I knew that he was acting like that because he felt that I had forced him out on this date...and I knew that it was going to take him time to trust me...which in turn sent my determination factor up several more notches. "Look Kyle...I know that you feel like I forced you out on this date of ours and I am sorry for that. I should have given you the choice of wanting to come out with me instead of forcing you" Taking his hand...I hindered his attempts to pull away as I crushed it lightly between the two of mine. "Its just that I really wanted to take you out and make it a special evening...but if you want to just cut our loses and end this evening I will take you home" I waited on baited breath for his response and the whole time I gazed hopefully into his eyes praying that he would give me the answer that I longed to hear.

        For the briefest of seconds I saw what looked to me like understanding and then it was gone in an instant. "Whatever...I don't care. It isn't like I have anything else to do tonight anyways" was his response...and being the chump in love that I was...I took what I could get at that time.

        "Great" I responded...praying to god that this was a sign that the evening was only going to get better...but boy was I wrong. I signaled for the waiter to come back to the table and Kyle was actually tolerable towards him for the remainder of our dinner. He still refused to speak...but I kept a one sided conversation up in hopes that he would relax enough to see that spending an evening with me wasn't going to be that bad...and even after all my hard work and effort I still got no response. After dinner we walked back to the car hand in hand and he still hadn't uttered a word. "It's still kind of early...how about we go hang out at the bar for a while. It just so happens that I know the owner really well and if you play your cards right...he may give you a drink or two on the house...as well as other things" I chuckled...as I tried like hell to lighten the mood.

        "Whatever" was his response as he jerked his hand from mine as we waited for the valet to return with my car.

        "Right...whatever" I mumbled as I took the keys from the man who had finally appeared with my keys and climbed into the seat besides a fully pouting Kyle. Again we drove in silence...a silence so strong that I felt as if I was going to lose my mind at any moment from it all. I think that I broke some serious speed records as I raced towards my bar in hopes that a few drinks and some good music would mellow his agitated mood.

        Leading him to an empty table...I excused myself for a moment as I made my way over to my club manager to check on some club business...but before I did I told the bartender to allow Kyle to have whatever he wanted and it was all on me. I knew that I shouldn't have left him for as long as I did...but a small emergency had arisen that had to be taken care of immediately. When I finally did get back to the table I found a clearly drunk Kyle sitting in the same spot as I had left him with several empty shot glasses before him. "How many of these has he had" I questioned the waitress as she made her way back to the table with another shot glass full of bourbon that Kyle inhaled before she even had a chance to place it on the table. "Remind me to fire you and Jimmy later" I growled at her...ignoring the tears that were forming in her eyes as she walked away from us. All thoughts of a perfect evening with the perfect man died in that instant. "Come on...lets get you home" I spoke loudly over the beat of the music as I attempted to help him out of the chair.

        "Get your @#%$ hands off me" he yelled...jerking away from me as he fell backwards into his seat again. "I don't want to leave...I want another drink"

        "I think that you have had enough"

        "Don't you @#%$ tell me when I have had enough" he hissed as he tried to get his waitress's attention. I watched as she once again made her way over to where we sat...a look of outright fear plastered on her face as Kyle yelled for another drink. Nodding...I gave her the signal that she could go fetch him another drink and to bring one for me also...for at that particular moment in time I sure as hell needed one badly. For the next hour I could only sit there in stewed silence as he downed drink after drink. On several occasions I had asked him to dance...only to be turned down each and every time. In truth I was getting really sick of watching him drink himself into a stupor...so when a former @#%$ mate came up and asked me if I wanted to dance...I jumped at the chance...leaving Kyle and his drunk ass sitting by himself at the table.

        I could feel his eyes on me as I danced with a guy to this very day I cannot for the life of me remember his name. I had slept with him one night during my pre-Kyle days and we just never got to the stage where names were as important as @#%$ each others brains out. I knew that I should have stopped him when he placed his hand upon my leather clad ass...but I wanted to gauge what Kyle's reaction would be to see another man touching me in the way that I only wanted him to touch me. At first he didn't move...didn't even twitch a muscle as this man continued to grope me on the dance floor...but when he leaned in and attempted to kiss me...Kyle was all over his ass in a heartbeat. It wasn't roses and moonlight...but who was I to question anything as I quickly pulled his drunken form off the man he had knocked to the floor with one punch.

        "Don't you @#%$ touch him like that" he yelled as he dragged me away from the man who was trying to get as far away from Kyle's crazed ass as possible. Before I had a chance to respond...he had his hands woven within my hair as he jerked my face brutally forward where he crushed his lips forcefully against my own. I knew that he was drunk...but I didn't care as he ground his body seductively against my every hardening erection. 'Your place or mine" he slurred as we both gasped for much needed air.

        "Your...yours" I stammered as he grabbed my hand and jerked me...as if in a scene from another night off the dance floor and out into the alley towards my waiting car. His hands were all over me as I tried like hell to concentrate on the road before me...but it was too late as a motorcycle cop had appeared from the shadows as I ran my second red light in a row.

        "Thanks a lot" I groaned in frustration as I reached over his lap and placed my ticket in the glove compartment before I pulled off of the side of the road. "I hope you realize that you just cost me two hundred and fifty dollars in reckless driving fines"

        "I want you" he moaned drunkenly...ignoring the fact that due to him and his ministrations that I had been pulled over by this cop and ticketed for reckless driving. Thankfully it was my first offense and the officer decided to be a little lineate on me...no thanks to my drunken lover who kept asking him if he could wear his motorcycle helmet. "Take me to my place so I can @#%$ you senseless"

        "Oh you can best bet that I am taking your drunk ass home" I growled as I pushed him as far away as I could in his horny state as I continued to drive towards his apartment complex where I was going to deposit him into his bed and let him sleep off his stupidity. I was so ready for this night to be over for not one damn thing that I had planned had panned out. I was expecting fun and romance and what I had received instead was belligerence and drunkenness.

        "I think that I am going to be sick" he moaned...as he threw open the car door as I pulled into the parking lot and vomited all over the asphalt. "I...I don't feel so good" he murmured against my chest as I fumbled with his seatbelt in an attempted to remove him from the car. We didn't get another few steps before the retching sound once again filled my ears and before I knew what had hit me...he proceeded to vomit all over me. I had to fight the urge to throw up myself as the smell of puke wafted into my nostrils as I as quickly as possible assisted him up the three flights of stairs needed to reach his apartment. Within minutes I had him as well as myself as cleaned up as possible as I stripped him down to his boxers and placed him in bed. "I love you Max" I heard him whisper in his drunken stupor as he drifted off to sleep with a satisfied grin upon his face. I could literally feel my heart begin to crack as his words continued to play over and over in my head. I knew that I had to get out of there before I did or said anything that I would regret later...not that it would have mattered to him anyway for he was loudly snoring his ass off behind me...clueless to how deeply he had hurt me.

        As I made my way for the door...I spotted the bouquet of flowers that I had brought him earlier this evening as I stood before him with such hope and promise that this would be the night that he realized that he might want to love me as much as I loved him. I had to laugh at how naive I was in my thinking as I grabbed the flowers off the table and walking onto the kitchen and threw them where they belonged...in the trashcan. Without a second glance I stormed out of his apartment...with all intents and purposes of never returning. But...when you're in love intents and purposes mean nothing when it comes to the one that you long to be with more then life itself.

Continue to Part Eight

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