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One Crazy Moment

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Posted to the RoswellSlash mailing list June 18, 2002

Title: One Crazy Moment
Author: MaxMichaelEvans
Rating: PC-13
Disclaimer: Everything belongs to Katims and Metz, et al. I own nothing.
Parings: Max/Michael
Description: Michael POV, could continue from the episode 'Behind the Music'



        It was late as I opened the front door to my apartment. The darkness inside devours me as I closed the door behind. I didn't bother turning on the light though, afraid it might wake the shadow that was lying on my couch. I walked closer and my eyes adjusted to the gloom absorbing any source of light it could find. Max was sleeping, his shallow breathing a whisper, causing his chest to rise with every intake of air. Max wore only a t-shirt and boxer shorts to sleep tonight, like every night he was here, and the covers I gave him was down just below his waist.

        I sat on the floor near his head, looking at him through the dark. I don't do this every night, only tonight. Some reason tonight is different, special maybe. Just being this close to Max feels like it used to be, when we were younger, before weird, before Liz.

        Things change as everything does, even people. The older we get, the more experience we have, the more these events shape us. Max and I used to be tight, we used to be friends. No, I didn't mean that.

       I meant we used to be close, just Max and me, no one else. I smiled as old memories resurface, bubbles reaching home through water, and I smiled. Of course there was always Isabel, but she was just Max's sister, the girl we always teased and made fun of, the sister that got annoyed with us. She never much cared for us; she let us be while she did her own things - to be perfect.

        I fell in love with Max then and I think he knew, even though I never said a thing.

        Our lives changed completely one day, one single timeframe. The day Liz got shot. The structure of our lives was broken and torn apart in one single strike of a bullet. Max healed her, he had too, how could he not? After that, Liz was bought into our alien lives. It didn't matter how much I objected, how much I reasoned, Max already made his choice. Did I wish Liz to have died? Maybe not, but I didn't know her then. Anyway, I wouldn't have been able to stop Max anyway. I know Max would have blamed himself and probably me too for the rest of his life. Things still would have changed.

        Max is sleeping so peacefully, all the worries melted away into oblivion until the call into reality. I can't remember the last time Max smiled, a smile that could light up a whole city, hell a whole universe! Max moves a little in his dreaming state and turns his face towards mine as if he was privy to my thoughts. A secret conversation he never knew he had.

        Maria. Maria. She broke up with me a few hours ago. I was trying to make it up to her but... I guess I don't really have anyone anymore.

        After I lost Max to Liz on that day of change, Maria and I got closer. In a way she was the obvious choice, and allowed me to be close to Max and Liz at the same time. I really do love her, just not as deep as I love Max. True, sometime I don't understand her. She has these moments where she is really pissed off at me for some reason (I usually have no clue), and moments where I seem to make her really happy. Maybe I'm not being fair on her; I am still in love with Max. There is no denying that, I'm like a fly caught inside a web only Max could spin. If I didn't care so much about Max, maybe I would pay more attention to Maria, maybe...

        I shift my face closer to his, feeling his breath on me, our lips almost touching.

        I imagine our lives would have been simpler if the others never entered it, just us aliens. No Liz and no Maria. No Kyle and no Alex.

        Max shifts his face slightly and I pull back a little, worried he might wake up. When I see he's still asleep and I move my face back over his, studying his face, his features. The darkness seems to have lifted since I sat down. I can clearly see Max's features, his long eyelashes, his pointy ears and his kissable soft mouth. I don't know why I'm still here like this; I've lost all tracks of time, the sands keeps falling never to return.

        I love you Max, do you know that buddy?

        Do you know I still love you?

        I never told him, not out loud anyway. I never had the courage to no matter how hard I tried. Every time I thought I could or would, my thoughts would disappear and my heart would stop. My voice a still wind and calm sea. Nothing would come out and I quickly say something else to hide my inactivity, frozen with my own passion.

        I startled, Max's eyes are open! When did they do that? Eyes so large and so round I'm falling through them into space, floating through the stars. All my thoughts drained into those brown eyes and suddenly in that one crazy moment... my lips met his. Our tongues entwined in ecstasy and my lips set on fire. Our breath shattered into gasps and gulps of air as we tried to prolong this desperate deep kiss into eternity.

        We broke the kiss, breathing hard, taking the air that was deprived during that moment of bliss, in that crazy moment.

        Shit!

Continue to 'Explanation on Realisation'

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